Batman vs Superman is not the dog’s fault.

March 28, 2016

I don’t want to hear anybody that doesn’t like the tone or direction of the DC Cinematic Universe blaming Warner Bros because “they only care about superheroes making money.”  That’s like blaming a dog for dog fights.  Of course they only care about the money, that’s why they’re in business.  It’s why they make movies.  Like a dog doing a trick as often as you want once he figures out that gets the treat, it’s their nature.  If you don’t want Fido to put his rump down when you say “Sit” WHY are you giving him bacon every time he does it?


You don’t like Batman vs Superman?  Blame the people who bought a ticket to Man of Steel.  I don’t care how much they dissed it after, Warner Bros looked at the box office.  Those are dollar votes saying “Give us more of this.”  It’s a bacon treat for Fido and he figured out that he got it right after he put his rump down.  Rump down = bacon, not a difficult connection to make.

If you bought a ticket to BvS this weekend, you voted for this.  I don’t care what opinions you posted on social media before or after; on election day, you VOTED for MORE OF THIS.  You took money that you worked for and you handed it over to Warner Bros. You had plenty of information to make an educated choice: the trailers, the reviews, the director’s previous body of work.  Starting Friday you even had the reactions of people coming out of the midnight screening, the superfans that bought advance tickets weeks before they had all the information you had:


“And just their shell shocked demeanor here. This is not people coming out of a movie. These are survivors emerging from a collapsed mine tunnel. These are people being interviewed after witnessing a shooting at a convenience store.”

You voted for this.  You knew what you were getting and you voted for it. If it was curiosity in the spirit of “Let’s see what Trump will do next if he wins another primary” that doesn’t matter because your VOTE still COUNTS.

So whatever happens next, it’s not Warner Bros fault and it’s not Zack Snyder’s fault and it’s not Frank Miller’s fault.  It’s your fault.  These are the movies you trained Fido to make for you.  These are the non-heroes you said you wanted.  If you don’t like it, you don’t get to blame the dog for doing exactly what you trained him to.


This is all I am going to say and all I really can say on the subject of BvS as I haven’t seen it and don’t intend to.



The Countdown Continues…

March 14, 2016

It’s Part 2 of Cat-Tales’ Anniversary Countdown. To celebrate our 15th, we asked readers to submit their favorite moments from the 70+ stories.  How did your favorites fare?


Cat-Tales Top 15

March 8, 2016

It’s been 15 years since HAHAHAHAHAAA! It was my instant messenger again. I had to do something special, so I asked readers to submit their favorite moments from the 70-and-counting Cat-Tales.

The countdown begins here, but that’s only the beginning…

In the coming weeks we’ll be breaking ground on an entirely new Virtual Visitor Center that will let you live the tales as never before, we’ll be seeing complete formatting updates and some other tweaks on all ebooks and pdfs, including the compilations (so overdue). And if all goes well, we may even be seeing a few Tales translated into French, as well as a few other surprises.

If you would like to be involved contributing voice talent to projects similar to the audio books, please contact Chris through the forum, Facebook or Twitter.

And oh yes, Knight of the Mirrors. I haven’t forgotten. Next installment will be coming along soon.


In which Marvel’s Tom Brevoort brilliantly explains the history and social landscape behind the Superman Kills debate and Batman kisses a goat

February 15, 2016

Knight of the Mirrors isn’t the only conversation about Hollywood’s killer Superman.
For those not on Twitter, the Superman kills/Batman kills/Batman uses a gun issue came up again a few weeks ago,  and Marvel’s Tom Brevoort broke down the history and social landscape with nothing short of frank 140-character genius.  Here his lecture is compiled via Storify:

Batman, Superman and the Hero’s No-kill Rule


Tom Brevoort’s epic analysis of The Dark Knight, The Man of Steel, and the cognitive dissonance of a genre that won’t let these characters be who they are.


The Pennyworth Secret

January 27, 2016

The Butler’s Pantry

If you follow Cat-Tales on any social media, you know we had some fun with #NationalHotTeaDay (Yes, that’s a thing.)  Alfred made himself available for Q&A about a subject very near to his heart, with this enticing carrot: if he was sufficiently impressed with the questions he received, he would reveal the secret for brewing tea which was *ahem* redacted from the scene in Polishing Silver: The Journal of Alfred Pennyworth where he teaches Selina.

It seems he was sufficiently impressed, and so the questions, the answers and the secret are all available on the nascent niche site that was never really developed: The Butler’s Pantry.

Congratulations, Cat-Tales readers, and Enjoy.


New Knight of the Mirrors Chapter Drops: Part 7 Opening Ceremonies

January 19, 2016

The newest installment of the Batman and Superman tale Knight of the Mirrors drops today…


What are Lex Luthor’s plans for the Olympic Games in Rio de Janeiro? And can the World’s Finest Heroes figure it out in time?

Knight of the Mirrors Part 7 is on the Cat-Tales website and mobile-friendly mirror Cat-Tales.mobi.



Help some Heroes

December 4, 2015

Hey gang, the very best thing you can do for a story you’ve enjoyed is tell somebody.  That’s why I and one of the other Cat-Tales writers, Random Equinox, have each put one of our novel-length works up for consideration on Inkitt’s Fandom contest.  You can help us catch the eye of people who like Batman, who like Mass Effect, or just like a good geeky read.  Please consider giving either or both stories an upvote, or at least giving a share on your social network.

The Cat-Tales offering is the arc that began with Comedy of Errors and climaxed in The Gotham Rogues:

It’s been released with the title Through Other Eyes

The second story is by Random Equinox, which most of you know from the spinoff about The Z, particularly Don’t Fear the Z, offering an alternate POV on the events of Don’t Fear the Joker.  His Mass Effect Novel: The Hero Who Loved Me does something similar, retelling much of Mass Effect 2 (with some wonderful additions) through the eyes of Miranda Lawson.  It is a companion to his straight ME2 novelization: The Hero We Deserve, which is available with all his ME offerings on Fanfiction.net.


Please help this wonderful author find more reader as well.  The Hero Who Loved Me is ready for your consideration on Inkitt.


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