Posts Tagged ‘april 1’

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The Elephant in the Room

April 1, 2015

Guys, when there’s an elephant in the room, you introduce it.  Cat-Tales has gotten stale.  I know it, you know it.  I could ride it down or I could walk away with dignity. I’m choosing the latter.  Bruce and Selina deserve that and so do you.  So Cat-Tales is over, but I am pleased to announce my brand new series starting today:
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LEGO BAT-MITE TALES!
Because you don’t need fingers to fight crime, you just…

Okay, I’m still working on the tagline.  If anybody can help me, please for the love of Nutmeg, drop me an email.

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The Fool’s Day Curse is Broken

April 1, 2014

Every year it’s something. Cat-Tales has been taken over by the Metropolis Tourism Board and Ra’s al Ghul’s ninjas. We’ve seen Joker remake the whole website as Hyena Tales and some sick bastard made it into Chris’s House of Goggles. One year there were puppies. And one year a giant DC Comics logo loomed over the forum. (I won’t tell you which left a little puddle under the icons.)

This year, at last, we seem to have reached April 1 without ANYONE associated with Cat-Tales being messed with!

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Hyena Tales

April 1, 2013
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Celebrating 12 Years | 67 Tales | 2 Hyenas

Greetings, Internet!

All right-thinking Gotham-watchers among you will be thrilled to learn that the Batman-centric twaddle formerly residing at catwoman-cattales.com has been purged and the moving story of two hyenas finding love in the domicile of a misbegotten clown has taken its place.

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2 hyenas | The clown they love | The bat they hate | The ditzy blonde who walks them

You’ll thrill to the bone-chilling roller coaster of a semi-literate sociopath mixing metaphors and mutilating infinitives to bring you the most rip-roaringest hyena porn seen, heard or smelt since Agnes McGillicutty turned that Twillo fanfic into the global bestseller 50 Shades of Grayson.

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In a world gone mad, in a Ha-Hacienda without central heating, 2hyenas find love. And Silly Putty

You’ll cheer as the stupid blonde forgets to pay the electric bill, forcing the hyenas to cling to each other for warmth (even as they secretly plot to eat each other when the kibble runs out!)

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You can’t spell ‘slaughter’ without LAUGHTER. Something to think about.

You’ll weep, weep openly like the little girl you are when you read the disclaimer that no hyenas, bats, or even people were harmed in the making of this website.  WHY?  WHY couldn’t we sacrifice even a few fluffy kittens or pimply-faced fanboys to give the whole thing some realism?  Why am I plagued with such a sqeamish and tiny little minds.  You all disgust me.  Go away.


Uh, Cat-Tales website and Chris Dee’s Cat-Tales blog appear to have been hacked by Joker for April Fool’s Day.  We hope to have everything back to normal as soon as we get him back in his cage.

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The Week in Cat-Tales

April 5, 2010

What an amazing week it was, on the Cat-Tales stage, backstage, and in that pesky real life far from Gotham.
Chapter 4 of Don’t Fear the Joker got a wonderful reception.  April 1st saw the hacking of our beloved forum (and this very blog) by agents of Ra’s al Ghul.  You can’t imagine the headaches cleaning up something like that.




And despite the considerable demands related to that book release in a few weeks, I made enormous headway on one of those big TBAs I’ve been referencing on and off for a year.  So much so that I expect to actually make good on the implicit promise of calling them TBAs and announce one by the end of the month for a May opening.  Huzzah!

In other news, Random Equinox slipped in a new fic on us when he thought we weren’t looking.  Sneaky, sneaky, Random, but I found you… One of Those Days at ffnet.  Check it out, everybody.

And finally, I caught up on my reading this weekend… well, almost.  There’s still a half-finished library book on the nightstand, but all the rest is done.  And the unfinished one has only itself to blame.  I’m not what I’d call a lazy reader, but a 60-page introduction drains away all the reader’s enthusiasm for the material.  Let’s put it this way: you know the one about the IT guy who goes to a Tech Support center for some extra training?  They’ve got this picture up of a ditzy looking blonde with the caption that her password is MickeyMinnieDonaldDaisyGoofyPlutoSacramento – because it had to be 6 characters and a capital.  Here’s the thing:  if that’s your opinion of your audience, you shouldn’t be writing.  Seriously.  Yes, there is a need for context if you’re serving up period material from the early years of the Cold War, but 60 pages worth?  I’m not sure if the problem is lack of discipline – taking 9 paragraphs to say what can be covered in 2 – or if it’s what I suspect:  simply not trusting the readers.  The thing is, we’re not talking about some random sampling off the street.  We all made a choice to buy the book, or in my case borrow it from the library.  Assume we’re at least, y’know, functionally literate and didn’t buy the book as a doorstop.  Give us a little context, and then pay us the compliment of assuming that if we need more, we can take what you’ve told us and Google for more.  Anyway, point is, apart from this one annoying volume that is probably going to go back to the library unfinished, I’ve swept away the backlog.  Life is good.  Meow.

The week ahead looks to be a busy one.  I doubt I’ll be able to finish up Chapter 5, but as stated previously: book release.  You really have no idea how much graphic art and other paperwork is required.  Oh, which brings me to the neatest piece of trivia from the mailbag… which I realize will be a longer entry.  We’ll save that for Wednesday.  Ciaomeow, everybody.

Chris Dee
www.catwoman-cattales.com
cattales.yuku.com
cattales.wikispaces.com

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