Posts Tagged ‘bruce and selina’


The Thing to Remember about Bruce Is He’s Trompe L’oeil…

February 13, 2020
“The thing to remember about Bruce,” said one of Bruce Wayne’s oldest friends at a Park Avenue dinner party, “is that he’s trompe l’oeil, his life is crafted to deceive the eye. He created a character that he plays, and the press laps it up.” – Bradford Dormont, Mayfair Magazine

To the world, Bruce and Selina Wayne have been on their honeymoon and now bringing them home requires a protocol.  The kind of protocol Bruce has engineered a thousand times in protecting his identity… but it’s been a while since he did it while Bradford Dormont was in town, eagerly chronicling the lifestyle of Gotham’s elite.  The eerily insightful society scribe has already noticed things about Bruce that Bruce would rather he didn’t.   Will the Dark Knight roll the dice one time too many?  Only time will tell.

A happy by-product of the great Bat-scheme is its showing off Bruce’s killer beach bod.  This aspect of the story returns Cat-Tale to its roots incorporating and commenting upon aspects of the official comic, which appear as tabloid media in the Cat-Tales world, most often the Gotham Post.


Tom King’s Batman run–which centered on Bruce and Selina’s relationship as much as Cat-Tales–catered to the female gaze more than once, but issues 78 and 79 drawn by Clay Mann (with colors by Tomeu Morey) went above and beyond, leading to a full out media blitz in non-comics publications like Screenrant, Entertainment Weekly and elsewhere.

“It seemed rude not to mention it,” says Cat-Tales author Chris Dee, and then amends: “No, not quite true.  The fact is, if you’re someone like me with a fairly animated Selina in your head, and after 18 odd years, DC actually has someone writing some a batcat romance, and those stories cater to the female gaze to the point where outside media are writing articles about Bruce’s spectacular beach bod, a scene with her reaction has to be written.  Has to.  The Selina in your head will be going friggin’ nuts and that has to be shared with the world.  Also it’s the only way to shut her up.”

Mrs. Wayne Part 4: Trompe L’oeil is available on the main Cat-Tales website at and the mobile-friendly mirror


Halloween Reading List #TrickorTreat

October 31, 2019

There’s a lot of Halloween in Gotham, all Gothams, and Cat-Tales is no exception.   We have a lot of doors to knock on, so let’s get started…


The first, Trick or Treat, is an early tale, short and lighthearted as the early stories are–but like the early stories, what often passed unnoticed as a bit of fluff became exponentially significant later on.  Bruce and Selina have not been dating that long in Trick or Treat, and discoveries are still being made–such as Bruce’s devotion to Sherlock Holmes.  The Folklore Museum is having a costume party on Halloween night, but of course so is Jonathan Crane.


The Gorey-inspired cover by Lady Dien is said to be Chris Dee’s favorite.

Far more macabre, from guest writer Wanders Nowhere is the Batman v. Dracula like no other – and with a significantly higher body count – Capes and Bats.

Is it over?  Whew!  Less blood in this one.  The New Black is not set over Halloween, contains no monsters or deaths by excessive blood loss.  It did drop on October 31, 2006 however, and since it keeps getting passed over for On this day tweets, we wanted to include it.  Bruce Wayne is dating Selina Kyle, Claudia Muffington is with Harvey Dent, beware debutantes at the Iceberg, rogues are becoming the new black.

Finally, Spontaneous Generation, the suspense tale that may cross into horror when Poison Ivy, “going through changes” that seemed like a character arc, stumbled into magic gone sideways in the previous tale and suddenly, inexplicably, found herself transformed.


Happy Heist Day: The Cutest but Least Convenient Bat/Cat fight ever.

March 18, 2015

There are days when it’s ten kinds of awesome having a fully-characterized, three-dimensional, complex and nuanced Batman characters in your head. Then there are days like this, when I’m sipping morning coffee—innocently sipping morning coffee—and happen to hear that it’s the 25th Anniversary of the Gardner Museum heist.


I ignore this for a while, thinking it warrants no more than a link on the Cat-Tales facebook page, reminding readers how Selina taunted Bruce with information about the famous robbery in order to get him to come to bed in The Gotham Rogues, and a short while later, the FBI did in fact report a break in the case, anticipating recovery the art. Ha!

That was my plan… but then inner Selina starts campaigning to make it Heist Day, an international Cat Burglar Holiday, and I should call for everyone to wish her a happy one and post pictures, etc. etc. After all, half a billion dollars worth of art taken including three Rembrandts, a Vermeer, a Manet and sketches by Degas, THAT’s an anniversary the community celebrates.


Then Inner Bruce pipes up, reminding me that the heist inspired Senator Edward Kennedy to make the stealing of major art works from a museum a federal crime, increasing the statute of limitations to 20 years. Hardly something for criminals to take pleasure in, but a giant step forward for law enforcement.

The two of them have been bickering about it ever since, and it would be adorable except I’m trying to get stuff done.


Don’t blame me when The Neighborhood: Chapter 4 is late.  Blame them.


The Femme Fatale has arrived

February 5, 2015
Selina Kyle as Gina O'Malley

Selina Kyle is Gina O’Malley, femme fatale to Batman’s Matches Malone gone deep undercover with the Irish Mob in Cat-Tales: The Neighborhood

‘Got a match?’ Matches Malone inhaled, his eyes lingering just long enough on a delicately suntanned ankle to be tempted upward… The Femme Fatale has arrived in The Neighborhood- Chapter 2: Sitrep.  On the Cat-Tales website and mobile-friendly mirror



October 1, 2014

This impromptu scene of Bruce and Selina at a high society party was inspired by a panel submitted to Chris Dee’s tumblr…

Bruce and Selina in BORED

Bruce and Selina in BORED

Read it here.


Coming to bed?

March 24, 2014

Coming to bed?

New in the Cat-Tales Scenes Gallery: Bruce and Selina in the Batcave in “Coming to bed or not?”

“Bruce, you’re putting me in an impossible position,” she said wearily. “Bed has to happen. Now, if you don’t want to get on board with this, I can fight you or I can tempt you—both are among Kitty’s favorite pastimes, as you know. But the thing is, I’m tired too and both of those are work. So why don’t we just agree that you come to bed now, and in the morning, I’ll tell you who engineered the Gardner Museum heist.” ~Selina Kyle, The Gotham Rogues

Something about a borrowed dress shirt, gets the job done every time.


Flash the Bat-Signal, Jim Gordon is back in Cat-Tales

October 8, 2013
Catwoman depicting shooting Commissioner Gordon on the cover of The Gotham Post

Cat-Tales began with this whopper in The Gotham Post

I’m often asked what I would do differently if I was starting Cat-Tales today. I tell them honestly: Not much, but the big difference is that James Gordon would be police commissioner.   Cat-Tales began when he had resigned after being shot in the ill-conceived Officer Down storyline, an event that was instrumental to getting that Runaway Snowball of WTFTM rolling that sparked A Girl’s Gotta Protect Her Reputation in the first place.

It was right for the time.  It was right for the Catwoman story being told, and it was right for the meta commentary on DC Comics that is the series’s raison d’etre.   But it’s not quite right for an ongoing Batman series.  For years, I’ve planted my flag on the principle that stories have certain elements that are not negotiable, and where Batman is concerned Jim Gordon is one of them.  That’s his chair.

He has been present in the series, as Barbara’s father and retired commissioner.  It’s been wonderful, because the decision and his status as a retiree brought a depth to his relationship with Bruce.  Still, I’ve missed him on that roof.  Four stories ago in The Gotham Rogues the first clue dropped:

The man who had served as police commissioner since Jim Gordon retired wanted Batman to know he was being vetted for a Presidential Appointment to the Department of Justice… In all probability, Gotham would have a new police commissioner by the end of the year.

From the beginning, Commissioner Muskelli was established as a political animal.  The change was easy to set in motion, and with so much drama in that tale, I trusted that the significance would be missed, or if noticed it would be quickly forgotten.  Things have developed slowly, through Wayne Rises and Inside an Enigma.  Now, at last, in the new story that begins today, Jim Gordon is back on the job.


Jim Gordon is back. When he resigned, Catwoman was an anonymous cat burglar. Now she’s Selina Kyle, living with Bruce Wayne, and running this company that’s messing with Ra’s al Ghul. There might be a learning curve.

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