Archive for the ‘cat-tales’ Category

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Bruce and Selina’s Wedding Gifts (It Can Actually Get Worse)

May 4, 2018

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If you enjoyed the Intermezzo but have been wondering what Selina saw in the pages of the Gotham Post, great news! That scene appears in the new Cat-Tales: Gifts by Chris Dee and Wanders Nowhere.

You will see Bruce Wayne’s bachelor party.  You will see Selina’s bachelorette.  You will see there are actually worst wedding gifts than Booster Gold’s…  Oh.  So, uh, maybe not great news, more like, eh, news.  News of an indiscriminate nature.

The story begins today on the Cat-Tales website

Cat-Tales 74: Gifts
By Chris Dee and Wanders Nowhere

And the mobile-friendly mirror, Cat-Tales.mobi

 

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The Dress

April 4, 2018

The last time Selina Kyle was “the most downloaded fully-clothed woman on the Internet” was the first glimpse of Anne Hathaway in The Dark Knight Rises and it prompted a short Cat-Tales intermezzo called I Was Riding a Motorcycle.

Today brings a worthier object which might or might not make it into the next tale:

Cat-Tales Intermezzo: The Dress

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It wasn’t an ideal morning to have breakfast on the terrace: it was overcast, a little brisk and the air had a damp, dewy feel that threatened rain later in the day.  Still Selina took her coffee outside.  She was about to do something that wanted distance from her morning routine. She was about to do something… stupid.  And the mind-splittingly stupid thing must not be ushered into her life with an unrestrained open-armed welcome as if this is simply the way it was going to be now.

“Okay,” she announced, looking suspiciously at the open expanse of table beside her coffee cup.  There was a centerpiece—samian ware, she thought absently as she moved it—and then she repeated “Okay” as she regarded the now totally bare tabletop apart from her coffee cup.  “Let’s do this,” she said, and sat.  She took a very deliberate sip of coffee. The sun crept out from behind the clouds and bathed the patio in a warming glow—and she shot it a nasty look like its hopeful imagery was not welcome.  There was even a bird chirping that she hadn’t noticed before, and she scanned the now idyllic setting with the simmering contempt of a wet cat.  “This is why we don’t do mornings around here,” she grumbled.

“Alright, let’s get this massive mistake over with,” she said, extracting the folded newspaper seemingly from nowhere as she had every night on the stage of the Hijinx Playhouse to segue into her monologue’s triumphant conclusion at the end of Act I.

“I’m sure you all saw this,” was the line, but instead of holding up the despised tabloid for the audience to see the glaring headline, she laid the Gotham Post on the table and looked down on the glossy image. Instead of a bloody Jim Gordon lying sprawled in the foreground, there was nothing but Venetian lace and rich ivory peau de soie from the Viaduc des Arts showroom of Malhia Kent, Avenue Daumesnil, Paris.  Instead of receding into a blurred image that was supposedly her running away from a shooting, the folds of elegant fabric receded into a blurred image that was supposedly her in the Deeor atelier pinned in for her first fitting.  Instead of a second coming headline screaming OFFICER DOWN, a comparatively restrained SOMETHING OLD, SOMETHING NEW teased the first glimpse of Selina Kyle’s wedding gown.  Shot by some mysterious means through the 57th Street window, it had the usual Gotham Post embellishments (black lace, for the love of Bast) but compared to the paper’s previous slanders, sketchy taste in a bridal palette could only be called progress.

She was really going to do this.

She was really going to do this.

She was really going to open the Gotham Post sans mind control and read what they were saying about her.

“Do it quick, like ripping off a Band-Aid,” she said and did just that.

She breathed.

Deeor hadn’t sold her out—thank God.

They got the materials right but that really wasn’t surprising.  Shipments from Jesurum on Calle Larga XXII Marzo a few blocks west of Piazza San Marco and Malhia on Avenue Daumesnil coming to the boutique could only be for the Wayne dress.  They didn’t know why and that meant her secret was still hers to tell Bruce and the world in her own way and at her own time.

Making a tweezers with her outstretched fingers, she carefully picked up the very corner of the page as if to touch as little as possible as she turned.  Since she’d gone this far, buying and reading a Gotham Post, she may as well press on.

Alfred was in the dining room.  It wasn’t his usual day to dust there, but he knew Miss Selina had varied her routine.  Seeing that she was up early and had settled far from the intercoms in her suite and the morning room, he thought it best to be within earshot should she require anything.

“Sweet merciful god!” rang out from the terrace.

 


The tale of Bruce and Selina’s wedding will continue at catwoman-cattales.com

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It’s #CatwomanWeek and Bruce and Selina’s March Down the Aisle Begins in the latest Cat-Tale

March 16, 2018

According to DC Comics, Selina Kyle’s birthday is March 14 and the internet marked the occasion with a #CatwomanWeek hashtag that’s celebrated her iconic costume, favorite quotes, comics and of course her defining relationship…
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Cat-Tales marked the day by dropping its latest installment The Engagement Party, a one chapter one shot which officially begins Bruce and Selina’s march down the aisle.

This is really happening, Bruce and Selina's march down the aisle begins in Cat-Tales 73: The Engagement party

This is really happening, Bruce and Selina’s march down the aisle begins in Cat-Tales 73: The Engagement party

As readers know, Cat-Tales blazed the trail for Bruce and Selina’s relationship moving beyond the trope, but Bruce proposed way back in Wayne Rises–as in 2012–and they hadn’t made much progress down the aisle.  That changed last year when Tom King had Bruce pop the question right there in the flagship comic of the franchise: Batman #24, and a few weeks ago, DC set the date.  July 4th 2018 DC’s Bruce and Selina are tying the knot.  Possibly it’s a race.  Possibly it’s a competition.  Possibly…

Possibly Batcat fans are in for a very full summer.

Cat-Tales 73: The Engagement Party is posted for online reading on the main Cat-Tales website and mobile-friendly Cat-Tales.mobi.  Ebook and pdf will be available shortly.

 

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Batman Becomes a Cat Burglar to Rival Catwoman Herself in Cat-Tales: Pearl

February 17, 2018

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The Cat-Tales: Pearl ebook is now here for Kindle and in the universal epub format for all readers and devices, along with print-quality PDF.  Free download as always on the story page on the main Cat-Tales website.*
The World’s Greatest Detective marrying the World’s Greatest Thief. There are only a few ways this story could go. All of them involve a heist.

*Note: all Cat-Tales are available for reading on the web on a mobile-friendly mirror site: Cat-Tales.mobi however downloads are not available, only a special link for iPhone/Safari-users. Pearl is the last Cat-Tale that will have this special link on the mobi site.

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Pearl Concludes with Part 8: Heist

January 12, 2018

One year ago, Cat-Tales: Pearl began with Part 1 – White Belt and Thomas Coronet was conceived as a new criminal cover for Bruce, one completely unlike Matches Malone.  Tommy would be a world-class thief at home in Bruce Wayne’s world.  Now it concludes with Part 8: Heist – and a heist many readers have waited for for a long time – but Tommy as a LexCorp guest for yacht racing?   Might just be taking the idea too far.

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Will the ultimate heist end in triumph or disaster?  Find out in Pearl 8: Heist on the Cat-Tales website and mobile-friendly Cat-Tales.mobi.

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New installment of Cat-Tales: Pearl drops. Part 7: Fortuna

November 17, 2017

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Forecast for Metropolis: Cloudy, Precipitation 0%, Humidity 74%, Wind 14 mph. Chance of Cat Burglar 100%

Pearl Part 7: Fortuna on the main Cat-Tales website and mobile-friendly mirror Cat-Tales.mobi

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Batman-as-Sherlock Holmes Tale TRICK OR TREAT reveals new Gorey-ised Cover for Halloween

October 31, 2017

Homaging the original horror-influenced but pastel-colored artwork by Lady Dien, the new cover for Cat-Tales: Trick or Treat has gone full Edward Gorey with an evocative black-and-white palette and textured etching off a well-aged plate:

Batman as Sherlock Holmes in Cat-Tales: Trick or Treat, with Selina Kyle, Alfred Pennyworth, Talia al Ghul, Edward Nigma

Batman as Sherlock Holmes in Cat-Tales: Trick or Treat

 

It’s a Halloween at an Exhibit celebrating the Mystery Whodunit at the Folklore Museum, and all is not as it seems…

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